Sarah Manguso: Hell
The second-hardest thing I have to do is not be longing’s slave.Hell is that. Hell is that, others, having a job, and not having a job. Hell is thinking continually of those who were truly great. Hell is the moment you realize that you were ignorant of the fact, when it was true, that you were not yet ruined by desire. The kind of music I want to continue hearing after I am dead is the...
“I’ve always wanted to not give a fuck. While crying helplessly into my pillow for no good reason, I would often fantasize that maybe someday I could be one of those stoic badasses whose emotions are mostly comprised of rock music and not being afraid of things. And finally - finally - after a lifetime of feelings and anxiety and more feelings, I didn’t have any feelings left. I...